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April 2003 Archives

April 1, 2003

Hope, Yet Again

Well, I had a job interview today for a elderly home care kind of place. They said I should hear back by Friday. It sounds interesting, and not that difficult. I could handle staying at someones house for an overnight a couple times a week. Or for a chunk of time on a weekend. So we'll see.

I'm still working on trying to figure out how to get Syn's site working right. And I have a plan for another blog type thing over here that's just horribly dorky. It's been running around in my head for a few weeks now and the only way I can make it stop is to just code the silly thing and put it out there. I may do that tonight, but then again we've got elections tonight which means I'll be busy.

Speaking of which. I should go so I can vote before I have to be at work.

April 2, 2003


I just got an update on my second cousin Phillip who is in Iraq. He is in the Marine First Expeditionary Force, 1st Battalion, 4th Marines. They're south of Baghdad and destroyed munitions at the Baath Party Headquarters in Al Kut. The article says they were welcomed by the Iraqis there so that's good news.

Just thought I'd pass on that little update.

PhotoBlog Stuff

There are new Dolce pictures up in the PhotoBlog! So head on over there and check out my sweet little boy.

April 3, 2003

Oooo Oooo Oooo

is a
Rhubarb-Eating Howler Monkey

...with a Battle Rating of 5.9

To see if your Food-Eating Battle Monkey can
defeat Sunidesus, enter your name:

What kind of monkey are you?

Could Someone Please Tell Me What's Going On?

OK, so Chris is apparently no longer on TechTV. Why? I have no idea. It's so sudden, and, well, strange!

Call for Help has become a part of my routine the past few months. Ever since it moved to the 2 pm time slot. If I leave my house at 3 I arrive at work on time. So watching CFH works perfectly, as soon as it's over I'm out the door and on my way to work. I get my daily dose of Chris at a wonderfully convenient (for me anyway) time. I might watch tomorrow to see what they say, but on a regular basis Leo just doesn't do it for me. I want my nutty, hyperactive, you never know what he's going to say next, Chris!

I'm definately going to have to figure out a way to get to Gnomedex now! I desperately wanted to go already, but now it's an even bigger desire!

I'm not sure what's going on in TechTV land, but everything seems so odd that something strange had to have happened.

I was introduced to blogging when Chey was on CFH last summer. I can't thank the two of them enough for that. I've met so many amazing people through blogging, and become a different, more confident person because of it. The idea of moving to a different market isn't nearly as scary as it used to be, because I know that all I have to do is turn on my computer and all my friends are right there ready to support me.

So Chris, I will miss seeing you on my television every day. But I am very thankful that I will continue to see you on your blog and in my inbox everyday in my Lockergnome newsletters. And I hope to goodness that I'll be able to see you again, this summer at Gnomedex.

It Really Sucks...

When you're driving on the interstate for two hours in lots of rain and strong winds, and then the rain turns into sleet, and then your car goes off the road and flips over two times.

I'm okay, but my parent's car is a mess. I took them to the airport this morning, they're going to Peru for a month. So now I need to figure out how to get ahold of them so they can tell me what they want me to do with their car!

This was SOOOOOOOOOO not the way I was planning on spending my day!


You are orange. You are emotional. Outside, you are bitter and stubborn, inside you are hopeful, hoping someone will come save you from the bitterness of your own mind. You constantly feel the need to prove yourself, and you look up to those who can make thier dreams happen. You are broken, but not beyond repair like maroon.

What inner color are you?

That describes me really well actually. Interesting how these silly on-line tests can tell us so much about ourselves.

Found at LillyAnne's place

This Evening's Plan

Due to today's events I won't be blogging Survivor. I'll be doing it later tonight just in case anyone was really looking foward to it!


The wonder that is the geek!


I'm feeling very lucky right now.

So far three people have died in accidents tonight. Looking at some of the video is making me feel so thankful.

I could have been seriously hurt, but I'm OK. I know that God was looking out for me this morning, and that's the only reason I'm not one of those people that was hurt or killed today. And I just want to say thank you to everyone that has sent me hugs and prayers/thoughts/vibes/mojo, I really appreciate it.

Syn told me she's dragging me to the ER after the 10 though. I've had a headache most of the day and since about 5:20 or so I've been dizzy on and off. Her dad is a firefighter dude and he thinks I've got a concussion and told her she has to take me to the hospital. So we'll be doing that tonight. I've been getting progressivly more sore throughout the day, so we'll see what I feel like tomorrow I guess!

April 4, 2003

Survivor Blogging

Since I was otherwise occupied with the days events I'm just getting around to blogging Survivor now. Syn did take me to the ER and it would appear that I've got a mild concusion. So she's staying over at my place tonight to keep an eye on me.

On with the show!

What would have been 7:10... Matt is definately losing it. He's just all creepy and weird.

7:15 That was one very strange challenge!

7:22 "Loofah" is an odd sounding word. I wonder if Deena is playing Dave or if she's serious?

7:25 Syn says "Like either of you would eat that banana split if you did win so shut the h--- up!"

7:35 Can I have one of those masks to paint? That looks like fun! It'd be frustrating to have all that work smashed though.

7:43 Oh ick! I so didn't want her to win immunity. She's just so annoying! If Jenna and Heidi would go away I would be a much happier camper.

7:49 So Matt is probably sticking around because everyone is talking about him. But they're all talking about Dave too, so I dunno. I think it might be one of those two, but we'll see.

7:52 Matt: all those people that you think are your friends? They all think you're creepy! You're just so weird!

7:55 Well it would appear that the only person that voted for Matt was Dave. Interesting. Especially after everyone was complaining about Matt all episode.

We'll just have to see what happens next week.

April 5, 2003

Let Loose the Dogs of the Internet

Who let the... um... dogs out?

Speakers are needed, and all beverages should be firmly on solid surfaces (not in your hand!)

Link from Gretchen

April 6, 2003

Time Warp

I was feeling nostalgic tonight and started reading through some of my posts from last summer. I stumbled across this post and it's quiz. I just couldn't resist taking it again to find out if the answer had changed.

Lo and behold it did!

43.75 %

My weblog owns 43.75 % of me.
Does your weblog own you?

Last August 8th my blog only owned 18.75% of me. How times have changed!

April 7, 2003

Random Fun

You can go make your own license plate at this site. I couldn't resist one of the old yellow plates from when I was little. Lots of fun.

Thanks to Robyn for the link.

Tonight I Sleep

For tomorrow I have orientation.

I found out on Friday that I got the job I interviewed for on Tuesday. It's a non-medical home care thing. Basically doing errands, cooking, doing laundry, and just being there for older people. No idea what it's going to be like, I'm sure I"ll learn more in the morning. Hopefully this goes better than the last part time job I had!

I told them that I'm mostly available for overnights or weekends, and overnights would be really easy. Just hang out at someone's house, apparently you're even allowed to sleep. I think I can handle that. We'll see tomorrow I guess.

Geek Expenses

Now I'm gonna need a wireless card! Chris has announced that wi-fi will be provided at Gnomedex.

And the job orientation thing went well this morning. It was a little overwhelming, lots of information, but I think I'll be ok. I start with a client tomorrow morning! Also just found out that the morning director just called in sick for tomorrow, so that means a couple hour long nap tonight (hopefully) and then working from 4am at my normal work. Then going to my new job at 9am until 11am. Should be interesting. We'll see how coherent I am tomorrow.

Come On, Everybody's Doing It!

Even Saddam has a blog!

Link from Laurence and the nobody's-dying-dead-pool

Three Things

01 | spiders
02 | the interstate (at least right now it does, see last Thursday's entry...)
03 | uncertainty
01 | Laurence
02 | My dad
03 | The images my crazy brain comes up with.
01 | my family
02 | blogging
03 | God
01 | being condescended to
02 | heat
03 | willfull stupidity
01 | Newsies!
02 | the attraction of dating/sex
03 | How people can look at nature and not believe in a Creator
01 | laptop
02 | some mail
03 | cell phone
01 | this survey
02 | procrastinating about the errands I need to do before work
03 | thinking very hard!
01 | see the world
02 | write a book
03 | be a positive influence on someone
01 | speak three languages
02 | direct a kick butt newscast
03 | be a good friend
01 | schizophrenic
02 | reserved (at first)
03 | anal-retentive
01 | keep my house/car picked up and clean
02 | stay sane without meds
03 | cook like my mother
01 | God
02 | Cirque du Soleil music
03 | yourself
01 | mean people
02 | telemarketers
03 | that little voice that says "you're not good enough"
01 | Chocolate!
02 | omelets
03 | My mom's chicken/bacon/rice dish
01 | better coding/web design
02 | how to do what I need to do, even when it's not what I want to do
03 | more ASL
01 | Coke
02 | milk
03 | water
01 | Reading Rainbow
02 | Mr. Rogers
03 | Sesame Street

stolen from Cheyenne

Diminishing Returns

Two numbers in my life dipped below important milestones today.

I paid this month's car loan payment and the total left on the loan just dropped below $8,000. Very exciting. I think I have two and a half years left on it, but I'm not completely sure of that.

The other number that got me all excited was the number on the scale. According to the scale at my parent's house I am at 199!!!!!!! Granted this is still quite a bit overweight, but just last November I was at 218. This is the first time I've been under 200 in a very, very, very, very, very long time. I know that everything I've lost is due to eating less and eating better, but this loss thing is making me kinda want to start exercizing to make it happen faster. I don't think I've ever wanted to exercise before. This is a new (and quite nifty!) area into which I'm venturing.

April 8, 2003


If someone can make me laugh by talking solely about German toilets, then they deserve a link! So here it is.

Thanks to Christine for the chortle.


Halley seems to have this amazing ability to pour feelings out through her blog in an incredibly intimate way. She can make me laugh, or wish, or today she made me cry. But it was good too. And I thank her for being the amazing person that she is and letting all of us see into her very being. Incredible.

April 9, 2003


Thanking the US

We aired video earlier today that included this woman and her family in their car. You can't see the husband in this shot, but he's grinning and waving; the little boy in the front seat also has a huge smile on his face.

I'm so happy for all of them that they finally get to experience freedom.

April 10, 2003

Survivor Blogging

OK, I finally got on-line here. The internet is only working on one computer at work so I ended up writing my Thursday Survivor blog post on a different computer and then copying it into here, now that I'm finally on-line! So... here it is:

Continue reading "Survivor Blogging" »

April 12, 2003

I'm All Behind

Jeepers! I get a little busy and can't do any blog-reading for two days and it takes me three hours to catch up on what everyone's been doing.

And what have I been up to? Well I'l tell you! Aren't you just lucky.

Yesterday Syn and I went to collect all the stuff that was left in my parents' car after The Incident. I hadn't really looked at the car when it happened so I had no idea what it looked like. It's quite impressive! And yes I did take pictures, which I'll be uploading in all their glory after I resize them.

Today was my first day on my own at my new job. I'm still feeling kinda unsure about it. I'm not real sure that the guy I'm supposed to be helping is real comfortable with me either. (I'm going to call him C and his wife E) E is a very cool lady, lots of fun to talk with. They're both around 80 I think, and she's very self sufficient. But he had a stroke a while back and needs lots of help. C seemed kinda uncomfortable with me too today. I don't know if we maybe both need some time to get used to each other or what. I was just awfully nervous while I was there and I don't think that helped the situation much! I'm going back again tomorrow morning and then in the afternoon I'll be meeting my other client (S)

Monday I'm supposed to call the ofice again and let them know how everything went. I probably don't really have anything to be nervous about, but I am anyway.

OK, enough with the seriousness! I need to go edit some pictures so I can upload them.


As promised pictures of my car are up in the PhotoBlog.

April 13, 2003

Welcome Back!

I'm sure you've already noticed, but Gretchen is back and has a very cool new design.


They're So Little!

I'm watching my Malcolm in the Middle DVD's from the first season. They're all such little kids! It's weird watching a show that has kids, they grow up so fast and look so different even a few years later.

April 14, 2003

The True Axis of Evil

Girl Scout cookies! Who decided to make absolutely delicious cookies that are irresistable, and then have small children sell them so that it's impossible to say no?

Trading Carpenters

I'm watching last night's Trading Spaces and in the little couple second thing coming out of the break there was a shot of Ty shirtless! That is one yummy looking man. And he's funny and smart to boot.

Update: Andy Dick shirtless on the other hand... not so yummy.

Notes to Self

http://www.cnn.com/TRANSCRIPTS/0204/12/mlld.00.html (at the bottom)




1-888-577-4668 Lindie Cook - State Farm

What a Wonderful World...

It's sunny, and I'm wearing shorts and sandals today. I think it's in the upper seventies but I'm not positive. I know Syn said she was going to go lay out this afternoon. I do love winter, but this kind of weather is pretty good too. I just don't want it to get any hotter! That's when I get miserable. Especially with the insane humidity we get around here.

April 15, 2003


If fanfic writers get plot bunnies, do programmers get code bunnies?

And the high today (yesterday, whatever) was actually 88, not the upper 70's like I originally thought. It broke the old record high by something like 7 or 8 degrees. And of course this being Wisconsin there's a possibility of snow later this week!

It's Burning Up In Here!

I'm so hot! It's another very warm day today. I pulled my big fan up from downstairs today and it's blowing full blast on me. I've gotta talk to my landlord and get him to put my a/c back in my window. Now that it's getting towards summer there's going to probably be a lot of "I'm so HOT!" posts. I really despise the heat so I'm bound to complain about it a lot.

In other news, Dolce has been a tunneling birdie today. He's so silly. If my sheets or comfortor have a small opening he'll stick his head underneath. Then he pops back out again to see if he missed anything while his head was under the blankets. Each time he goes a little bit further under the bedding until he's sitting underneath bopping his head against my legs. He makes me very ticklish!

April 17, 2003


This week's Theme Thursday is up in the PhotoBlog.

And I know everyone's already blogged it, but I just have to join in 'cuz it's so gosh darn cool! Michele is going to be on CNN on Monday. Sa-weet!

And the weather theme around here has been wet. (How's that for a segue!) It's been raining all day which is good because it's been really dry. We were having at least one or two grass fires every day for a little while.


It seems that overnight the world has become bright green, with red buds, and brilliant yellow green leaves. The brown is disappearing into the dampness.

You Are the Weakest Link!

No wait, that's the wrong show isn't it? On with the show!

I think tonight's episode is the one where you see "the Survivor you've never seen before!!" stuff. I'm sure there'll be something very worthy of blogging even if there isn't the standard challenges and tribal council.

7:07 OK, the guys are going to piss me off all over again here aren't they?

7:14 And Joanna is annoying me again too! This whole show is just going to be all the things that annoyed me, for a second time.

7:22 That was a nifty little musical/rhythm thing. Kinda like Stomp which is something I've always loved.

7:25 I kind of with they would have gotten rid of Shawna back then instead of Joanna. As annoying as Joanna was I think she would be less of a threat than Shawna at this point in the game.

7:29 Jeanne has some issues! Not that I don't understand the impulse, but that's just really immature.

7:36 Guess what? Heidi's pissing me off again too! Go figure.

7:40 I knew I liked the guys for a reason!

7:44 If Rob weren't such a horn-dog I'd like him more. He seems like a cool guy but he's so obsessed with sex!

7:48 Roger is an idiot. He was just so clueless as to what was going on around him. And maybe you can't change your personality, but it's only a month! You can pretend to be nice for a month.

7:52 Dancing in the middle of the night! That's adorable. Christy definately has a point thought. You gotta show your support and feelings for people all the time, not just when you need them.

7:55 I really did like Deena. I wish she hadn't been voted off.

April 18, 2003

Hmmm, I Wonder What This Means?

Found an interesting quiz over at Anything but Ordinary. I'm not sure if I agree with it, but it sure is food for thought.

It says my Empathy Quotient is 30:
0-32 = You have a lower than average ability for understanding how other people feel and responding appropriately. Most people with Asperger Syndrome or high-functioning autism score about 20. On average, most women score about 47 and most men about 42.

My Systemizing Quotient is also 30:
20-39 = You have an average ability for analysing and exploring a system. Systemizing is the drive to analyse and explore a system, to extract underlying rules that govern the behavior of a system; and the drive to construct systems. On average women score about 24 and men score about 30.

So apparently I'm a man that doesn't empathize very well! Huh!


I'm sitting here crying because of this site, and your connection to it. I'm scared that I'll have to put your name there someday. I can't bear that thought. Please, please don't let that happen.

Please Stand Up!

Who's the real Saddam? The answer is right here!

I can't stand Eminem, but that's just hilarious.

April 20, 2003

My Brain Hurts

I just spent the last 5 hours helping Syn move to a new domain. Go check it out and say HI! If I've done my job right there shouldn't be any difference from the old site. I'm slowly turning her into a geek. Mwahahahahaha!

There's still a few things that aren't working quite right, but they weren't working right before either! I have no idea how people do programming stuff for a living. More than a couple hours and my brain feels like it's going to explode. I do enjoy it a lot, but I wouldn't want to do it all day every day.

I stoped by work to work on it with her and it was lucky I did because our boss stopped in with his wife and new baby! Spencer is almost 3 months old now and he's adorable. We were thinking he was going to be walking by the time we finally got to see him though. I'm very thankful that he decided to bring him in to work today. I have a couple pictures, I'll be uploading those at some point. Right now though that would involve getting out of bed and going downstairs to retreive my camera. And that's way too much activity for me right now. :)

I had my first two real shifts with elderly client number 2 today. (Mrs. S) The person that showed me around last Sunday made me nervous. She made Mrs. S out to be this ornery old lady that didn't like anything or anybody. Soooo not true!

She's 90 years old and still very "with it" and just a lot of fun. She used to be an art professor at the local university and her father was one of the major players in the history of our city. We chatted for probably an hour while she ate dinner tonight and she's great. I can handle helping her out with stuff. She mostly needs people to do the dishes, and clean the house, make the bed. That kind of stuff. None of this giving sponge baths and dressing people nonsense.

I should really go to bed. I have to work for a couple hours in the morning and then Syn invited me over to have Easter with her family. That'll be nice. My parents are in Peru so I'm obviously not doing anything with them! (Yes I know that's a very strange sentence)


As promised Spencer pictures are up in the Photoblog. Isn't he just adorable?

April 22, 2003


Syn! Have you seen this "Home Shopping Network" tape? Kramer showed it to me tonight.

Oh. My. Word! It's one of the most disturbing things I've ever seen and it is SOOOO going on the blooper reel.

Go Wild!

We have a Game Seven!

I actually want the Red Wings to win the Cup, but I like the Wild too. And there's the added bonus of them beating the Avs.

Dorkiness Abounds

Remember a couple weeks ago when I was talking about this horribly dorky idea that was floating around in my head? Well it's been done. I set the silly thing up and it is now live.

It's mostly just dummy entries right now, but it all works. This all started with something I have to do every day at work. We run this little "On This Day in History" thing every day. I write it up and put the video in it the night before. Most of the time we get video and something that happened from NewsOne. But about once a week (sometimes more if they're being really stupid) they either don't send one, or don't give us the information we need. (like what year it happened!) A lot of the time it'll be something from just a year ago, practically ancient history! It always frustrates me and I'll go searching on-line for something that's actually interesting that happened on that day.

I've found a couple good sites, there's a science one, military one, and a music one that are pretty good. But I haven't been able to find anything that's more comprehensive. And when I stumble across interesting things that have happened I don't have somewhere to put that information. So, I set something up myself!

It's not the prettiest thing right now, but it's a work in progress and the meat of it is there. There's a dummy page for each day of the year so anyone can add anything. I realize it's incredibly dorky, but at least it's out of my head now!

And in other geek news. I'm thinking about abandoning my Photo Album and just putting all my pictures in the Photoblog. If I add categories to it it would be pretty much the same thing, but a lot less work for me! I dunno, it's something I'm toying around with at any rate.

Run Away!

Peter Pan is on Jimmy Kimmel tonight. I'm so very, very scared. So now instead of just being ridiculed by the on-line community, the general tv watching public can now make fun of him too! Well, at least the three people that actually watch Jimmy Kimmel...

April 23, 2003


THE WILD WON!!!!! Horrah!!

How's that for a third year expansion team down 3-1 in a series?!?!!

Now he has to shave his ugly goatee. Sa-weet!

April 24, 2003

Taking the Plunge

Well, I did it.

I had an appointment with my lawyer (boy does that sound strange) this afternoon and he's going to be filing my bankruptcy papers either this afternoon or Monday. Then about 6 weeks from now I'll have to go down to the bankruptcy court and have some sort of meeting there, and then I'm done! Except for finishing to pay the lawyer of course. At this point I only owe him $400 and at $100 a month I can handle that.

I'm just so relieved that this is finally going to happen. I feel so much better knowing that there is an end in sight.

Guess What!

It's Thursday. That means it's time for some Survivor blogging! Stay tuned...

7:08 I really wonder about the "we'll still be friends out of the game" thing. I hear people say it on every reality show I've ever watched. But does it actually happen? Do they stay friends? Somehow I doubt it. But maybe I'm wrong, it's been known to happen!

And Matt has a very good point. That is not the way to behave if you want people on the jury to vote for you.

7:12 I LOVE cheesecake! That stuff is just wonderful in my mouth.

7:15 I will agree that peanut butter and chocolate is one of the best combinations ever in the history of the planet. But I don't think I'd have spent that much money on it!

Oh Yum! Steak!!! I could really go for a nice juicy steak. It's not something I get a lot (it's kind of expensive after all!)

Very happy Butch got the bed thing. I like him. And has Christy bought anything? I've seen everyone get something except her. What's up with that?

7:22 If Jenna hadn't been such a b**** so far this game I might feel some sympathy for her, but whoops sorry! I just can't stand either of those twig girls. They annoy me to no end. (I think I say that every week don't I)

7:25 Oh, that was such a sweet letter that Christy got!

OK, Jenna went away for more than a month when she knew she wouldn't have any contact with her family, when her mom has a brain tumor!?!?! Who does that? If someone in my family was that sick, I don't care what opportunity I had I'd be staying home with them.

7:28 Oh Alex, that was stupid. You're gonna chase Rob over to the other half of the team (although I think that'd be a good thing, so go for it!) But it's stupid for you to do it.

7:35 That sounds really interesting... I wonder if their answers will be posted somewhere on the Survivor website? It'd be interesting to see how each of them thought about their tribemates at that point in the game.

Rob: PLEASE!!! switch sides!!!!

7:38 Matt still creeps me out, but at this point I'm glad he didn't get voted out last week.

7:40 Jenna: you ARE sleezy! Deal with it!

Yep, Matt's crazy! We're all in agreement on that one.

OK, Heidi and Jenna just keep guessing each other. They're just so arrogant!

Hmmm, Rob won. This'll be interesting. So, either Rob will go with Christy, Butch, and Matt and vote out Alex (crosses fingers) or he'll stick with the other three and vote out Christy, Butch, or Matt. If he does vote out one of the alliance then next week will be really interesting. With an even number of players it's awfully easy to have a tie.

7:49 Well, Rob. No matter what you do at this point three of those people aren't going to vote for you in the jury. You will have betrayed three people either way.

7:54 "No, I won't get voted out." Famous last words (I hope!)

7:55 Take That!!!

Don't feel quite so confident now do you? I loved Rob's little smirk there at then end. That was hilarious. I just hope that Heidi and Jenna are next. Next week will certainly be something to watch!

7:58 At least Alex undertands the game aspect of it. From the preview it looks painfully obvious that the twig twins don't.


Because I said so!

Freedom of Speech?

My boy Z has a great post up about the insanity surrounding this whole Dixie Chicks thing. I agree with him 100%, and I have the same confusion.

Yes, they had the right to say what they said. But guess what? I have the right to say I disagree! That's the way it works. Just because you're a celebrity doesn't mean that people can't criticize you. We all have freedom of speech. They can say what they want, and so can I!

It bothers me how much the media has made of the various celebrities being "punished" for their speech. They haven't been punished! Other people have just exercised their freedom of speech too.

That's. How. It. Works!

April 25, 2003

Some Funnies

Just because you're all so special to me, I'm going to share a funny thing I saw over at Solonor's site. It made me laugh so I'm going to subject all of you to it too!

Continue reading "Some Funnies" »


Eep! I just saw my first Matrix trailer on TV!

I'm so excited for that movie to come out. The first one was so completely mind-blowing. I'm sure the second one will be just as amazing. Woo-Hoo! I'm all excited now.


If the first three minutes of tonight's ER are any indicator, this is going to be one incredible episode!

April 26, 2003

What's the Diagnosis?

It's a tough call, but I think this diagnostic test may reveal the true nature of the beast.

Thanks to LillyAnne for the giggle.

A History Lesson

I realize I haven't really written as much as normal the last few days. People who've been here for a while know that I've struggled with depression for nearly seven years. Most of the time it's very much under control, but every now and then I'll have a period of time when it's all I can do to make it through each day. That's been me the last few days.

I noticed tonight that the series finale of Touched by an Angel was on though, and I just felt a need to write something about that. I don't watch it very often any more, but for its first few seasons my mom and I watched it every Sunday.

It came on the air shortly after one of my grandmothers died. We called her Nanny. I'm a Christian, and she wasn't. I had a very hard time with the idea that this woman that I loved dearly wouldn't be going to heaven. That combined with the beginnings of depression, general teen-age self hating, and some pretty major problems at our church resulted in me feeling very betrayed and unloved by God. I quit going to church. The only God-related thing I did was watching Touched by and Angel with my mom.

Every Sunday we'd go downstairs at 7 p.m. and watch a story about someone in trouble and how God still loved them. For at least two years this was our routine. Hearing that God loved me, regardless of what I did, every week eventually broke through to me. That was the beginning of me re-realizing that He really does love and care for me, that I can trust him. I still struggle with that, but that show was the beginning.

When I told my mom that a while back, she said "That's a big part of why I did that." She knew that I needed to hear that God loves me, even if I wasn't ready to think about it or talk about it with another person.

So even though I haven't really watched it for a number of years, that show continues to be very important to me. And I felt a need to mark its passing.

April 27, 2003

Here a Meme, There a Meme...

A new one (for me) Unconscious Mutterings. The idea is free association, what's the first word you think of when you see the word on the left. Seemed like something I should try. Here we go....

1. Slob::
2. 60::
3. Personals::
4. Famous::
5. Cancer::
6. Internet::
7. Previously::
8. Moonshine::
9. Ants::
10. Check::

Continue reading "Here a Meme, There a Meme..." »

April 28, 2003


Apparently I'm not very talkative today. I haven't really felt like writing anything.

I was sorta productive though. I made myself dinner to take with me to work. Then dropped off job applications at two places, deposited a check, and mailed bills.

Yeah, I know. I'm just a thrill a minute over here.

I am stuck at work until 9am though, so expect some barely coherent VERY tired blogging at some point tonight/tomorrow morning/whatever you want to call it.

April 29, 2003

Good News

From Zander! Very wonderful test results. I'm so happy for him and his family.

Ouch, Ouch, Ouch

My wrists hurt a lot today! I think it's because I had to do DayBreak this morning. Marking scripts for that show is a good 15/20 minutes of solid writing and I just don't seem able to handle that any more. My hands are rebelling against me!

Typing is still fine, but if I'm having a "bad day" just writing a simple two sentence note to someone can be too much. It feels like I can't hold the pen/pencil tightly enough to make it work. I'll just sit there staring at my hand wanting it to go one direction, and no matter how hard I try the pen just won't go that way! It's really frustrating.

That 20 minutes of marking scripts becomes miserable and then I'm hurting for the rest of the day. Not fun!! I'm just grateful that typing seems to be exempt from whatever my problem is. I can do that for hours on end without a problem.

Yes, I know there's a lot of people with a lot more serious problems, but this is my blog so I'm going to complain about my stupid wrists!

Oh, and there's a bunch of new stuff in the photoblog. I really need to investigate how to put thumbnails on this page so that everyone can see when I update...

April 30, 2003

Well, That Makes Sense!

I found the Belief-O-Matic over at Jenn's place. It seems to have pegged me pretty acurately!

1. Mainline to Conservative Christian/Protestant (100%)
2. Orthodox Quaker (100%)
3. Seventh Day Adventist (90%)

See You in Court

I have a court date.

The first week of June I'll be going to bankruptcy court. We're making progress on getting this whole thing dealt with. I'm feeling better the farther into this process I get.

I was also talking to a friend at work yesterday and he told me about a web programming class that's being offered at the local university this fall. It focuses on html, css, and java! It sounds like a great class, and something that I'd use a lot and be interested in. While I was on their website I found three other classes that sound really good. And they'd all work with each other and with my schedule.

I really don't want to go back to school, but they all sound so interesting. Or do I want to just sign up for two of them as a special student? I haven't done anything school related for a couple years and the thought of it is really intimidating. It's something to ponder.

About April 2003

This page contains all entries posted to Sunidesus Speaks in April 2003. They are listed from oldest to newest.

March 2003 is the previous archive.

May 2003 is the next archive.

Many more can be found on the main index page or by looking through the archives.